Love potion #9
My Shabbat guests departed last night at about 11:00. I was too weary at that time to drag myself over to the computer to post an entry. It is now Saturday morning and I have regenerated my battery. I’ll have to go back to Thursday night (or the wee hours of Friday, really) to put yesterday’s fatigue into perspective.
Liylah has learned that I am the lightest sleeper in the house, so if she needs something during the night, I’m her target. I grudgingly climbed out of bed and let her out at 3:00 a.m. in response to her incessant whining. I crawled back into my cocoon and waited. I checked on her several times, but she is master of the yard now that she doesn’t need to be tied (due to the fence), so she prances about for longer periods. I eventually drifted off to sleep. Yaron let her in at 8:00 a.m.! I felt awful. She never barks (except in the country, and mostly at the waves) so I did not hear her make a plea to be let back inside.
“She smells like skunk,” Yaron informed me, and scurried off to school. My day to work at home transformed itself into a day to solve a smelly mess. I myself have no sense of smell, so if Yaron hadn’t mentioned the skunk business, my house would probably have reeked after a while.
I understood that Gilly was not be up to helping me meet the challenge; I asked him what he and Gittit used when Lilylah was in the same smelly situation last April, and he said “water.” "Yeah, but what else?" I wondered. I wracked my brain to remember and searched through all the logical places to find remnants of the product they used, but came out empty handed. I called the vet to see if they sell something I can use. The secretary said that no product does the trick as a well as a home remedy. She gave me instructions for making the following potion: 4 cups 3% peroxide, ¼ cup baking soda and 1 tsp. dish washing liquid. Aha! I remembered that they had used peroxide after a few unsuccessful tomato juice baths. I had some, but not enough, so off I went out to gather necessary supplies at the pharmacy, and to pick up meds at the same time. I always try to accomplish more than one task at a time so as to maximize my time.
Liylah was not very compliant when invited into the tub for her bath. I had to lift her and place her inside, which was no easy feat. She's heavy! It’s amazing what physical strength and skills one can muster up in a time of need. As Susie puts it, “Trustez-moi,” this would never have been even remotely close to ‘my job’ in the past. Necessity brings out that survival instinct; some days I feel I can move mountains. Problem is that when it’s all said and done, I crash, and so does my body.
Liylah remained still and cooperative throughout the affair, but you know how dogs shake when they’re wet right? Well, her 5 hours spent outdoors left some mud caked into her paws, so the entire bathroom was eventually wet and mud streaked. On top of it, the bathtub was the hairiest mess ever. Needless to say it took me hours to shine her up from head to toe, clean the bathroom and wash all towels and her bed so as to rid the house of smells, which I could only imagine, since I can’t detect them myself. I tend to err on the safe side for this reason.
When I gave her the 'done' signal, s he jumped out of the tub by herself with ease; where there’s motivation, anything is possible.
By the time I sat down to do my work, it was 1:00. Gilly was enjoying the brunch I insisted he wake up to eat (oblivious to the reason for my exhaustion even though I relayed the story). He looked up and asked me to go out and buy him some cigarettes (a nasty habit that I cannot deprive him of since he has so few pleasures in life these days). I wondered at this point if I was being filmed for Candid Camera. I made an appeal to allow me some time to get something done for myself (sounds so selfish, but my work haunts me until its done), reminding him of the morning’s incident, but there was not even a flicker of appreciation for my situation in his eyes. I said, “I guess you feel like a sitting duck, having to ask me to do this sort of thing for you?" He nodded in agreement. I took a moment to reflect on just how much he’s had to give up, and decided that he deserves the favour regardless of my circumstance. I am strong and able, and this is what they call 'for better or for worse.' so I owe him the respect.
I made the trip worthwhile; I went off to the fruit store across from Tamara’s apartment. The woman who owns the store is Tamara’s landlady. She sells sweet, juicy pineapples for $2.99 (the cheapest I’ve seen them in the city) and Gilly adores fresh pineapple. I siezed the opportunity to buy the supplies for my contribution to Shabbat dinner. I told the Korean store owner that her produce is fresh, delicious and reasonably priced. She thanked me and explained that she is a nutritionist and believes strongly in the health benefits of pineapples. If I recall correctly, she said that they have anti-inflammatory properties. She went on to tell me that she is a trained nurse, and provided rich details of her practice in this field years ago, which spanned several countries.
I took notice of all the oriental health products she sells on shelves behind her. I told her about Gilly and asked if she knows of a good Chinese doctor. She gave me a name, address and telephone number, and I recognized that the street name was the same one that someone else mentioned. I left with produce, information and hope for alternative possibilities, but no cigarettes. It was pouring rain and downright chilly (it actually turned to snow not long after), but I forced myself to make the final stop and return home with what Gilly asked me for (and some home made Sushi for my own lunch to boot, which turned out to be scrumptious).
I managed to speak with P at the CSSS regarding OT, and she confirmed that what I am looking for is not a service that a CSSS can offer. She promised to check out who in the city would be able to provide Gilly with expert assistance, adapted to his particular needs.
Moments later I received a call from the Neuro. Denise, the neuro oncology coordinator gave me a number to call to arrange for an OT consult. Now it seems that all we’re missing is Dr. Kavan’s referral, and the appointment will be set. Once they chase him down, we will be contacted. The appointment will most likely be made for Monday, the 30th at the Neuro.
Gilly’s medical condition remains the same, but I notice more and more that his memory is fading. I do not fully understand the pattern; sometimes he surprises me by remembering things that I forget, but more commonly he has serious lapses. For example, he seems to have no recollection of having been in the hospital last weekend.
He doesn’t finish sentences; his bizarre statements / questions / responses have dissipated pretty much, but not completely.
He needs reminding (and a great deal of coaxing) to care for himself, but still manages independently yet exceptionally slowly (eating, shaving, dressing, and so on).
The situation is far from static; we need to keep a close eye on behaviour changes, but I am beginning to understand how very little control there is over the situation. The tumour plays havoc with his cognitive functioning in complex ways; the medication seems not to be the cause, although still, anything is possible. One day at a time is how we have to approach decision making, and so life is perpetually up in the air for us all.
One thing is for certain; love, affection, respect and devotion is the only ‘concoction’ that never creates negative side effects, so we’re just going to give him a huge dose, as many times a day as we can. Even though our health plan does not cover this, 'love potion' is the best medicine.
Liylah has learned that I am the lightest sleeper in the house, so if she needs something during the night, I’m her target. I grudgingly climbed out of bed and let her out at 3:00 a.m. in response to her incessant whining. I crawled back into my cocoon and waited. I checked on her several times, but she is master of the yard now that she doesn’t need to be tied (due to the fence), so she prances about for longer periods. I eventually drifted off to sleep. Yaron let her in at 8:00 a.m.! I felt awful. She never barks (except in the country, and mostly at the waves) so I did not hear her make a plea to be let back inside.
“She smells like skunk,” Yaron informed me, and scurried off to school. My day to work at home transformed itself into a day to solve a smelly mess. I myself have no sense of smell, so if Yaron hadn’t mentioned the skunk business, my house would probably have reeked after a while.
I understood that Gilly was not be up to helping me meet the challenge; I asked him what he and Gittit used when Lilylah was in the same smelly situation last April, and he said “water.” "Yeah, but what else?" I wondered. I wracked my brain to remember and searched through all the logical places to find remnants of the product they used, but came out empty handed. I called the vet to see if they sell something I can use. The secretary said that no product does the trick as a well as a home remedy. She gave me instructions for making the following potion: 4 cups 3% peroxide, ¼ cup baking soda and 1 tsp. dish washing liquid. Aha! I remembered that they had used peroxide after a few unsuccessful tomato juice baths. I had some, but not enough, so off I went out to gather necessary supplies at the pharmacy, and to pick up meds at the same time. I always try to accomplish more than one task at a time so as to maximize my time.
Liylah was not very compliant when invited into the tub for her bath. I had to lift her and place her inside, which was no easy feat. She's heavy! It’s amazing what physical strength and skills one can muster up in a time of need. As Susie puts it, “Trustez-moi,” this would never have been even remotely close to ‘my job’ in the past. Necessity brings out that survival instinct; some days I feel I can move mountains. Problem is that when it’s all said and done, I crash, and so does my body.
Liylah remained still and cooperative throughout the affair, but you know how dogs shake when they’re wet right? Well, her 5 hours spent outdoors left some mud caked into her paws, so the entire bathroom was eventually wet and mud streaked. On top of it, the bathtub was the hairiest mess ever. Needless to say it took me hours to shine her up from head to toe, clean the bathroom and wash all towels and her bed so as to rid the house of smells, which I could only imagine, since I can’t detect them myself. I tend to err on the safe side for this reason.
When I gave her the 'done' signal, s he jumped out of the tub by herself with ease; where there’s motivation, anything is possible.
By the time I sat down to do my work, it was 1:00. Gilly was enjoying the brunch I insisted he wake up to eat (oblivious to the reason for my exhaustion even though I relayed the story). He looked up and asked me to go out and buy him some cigarettes (a nasty habit that I cannot deprive him of since he has so few pleasures in life these days). I wondered at this point if I was being filmed for Candid Camera. I made an appeal to allow me some time to get something done for myself (sounds so selfish, but my work haunts me until its done), reminding him of the morning’s incident, but there was not even a flicker of appreciation for my situation in his eyes. I said, “I guess you feel like a sitting duck, having to ask me to do this sort of thing for you?" He nodded in agreement. I took a moment to reflect on just how much he’s had to give up, and decided that he deserves the favour regardless of my circumstance. I am strong and able, and this is what they call 'for better or for worse.' so I owe him the respect.
I made the trip worthwhile; I went off to the fruit store across from Tamara’s apartment. The woman who owns the store is Tamara’s landlady. She sells sweet, juicy pineapples for $2.99 (the cheapest I’ve seen them in the city) and Gilly adores fresh pineapple. I siezed the opportunity to buy the supplies for my contribution to Shabbat dinner. I told the Korean store owner that her produce is fresh, delicious and reasonably priced. She thanked me and explained that she is a nutritionist and believes strongly in the health benefits of pineapples. If I recall correctly, she said that they have anti-inflammatory properties. She went on to tell me that she is a trained nurse, and provided rich details of her practice in this field years ago, which spanned several countries.
I took notice of all the oriental health products she sells on shelves behind her. I told her about Gilly and asked if she knows of a good Chinese doctor. She gave me a name, address and telephone number, and I recognized that the street name was the same one that someone else mentioned. I left with produce, information and hope for alternative possibilities, but no cigarettes. It was pouring rain and downright chilly (it actually turned to snow not long after), but I forced myself to make the final stop and return home with what Gilly asked me for (and some home made Sushi for my own lunch to boot, which turned out to be scrumptious).
I managed to speak with P at the CSSS regarding OT, and she confirmed that what I am looking for is not a service that a CSSS can offer. She promised to check out who in the city would be able to provide Gilly with expert assistance, adapted to his particular needs.
Moments later I received a call from the Neuro. Denise, the neuro oncology coordinator gave me a number to call to arrange for an OT consult. Now it seems that all we’re missing is Dr. Kavan’s referral, and the appointment will be set. Once they chase him down, we will be contacted. The appointment will most likely be made for Monday, the 30th at the Neuro.
Gilly’s medical condition remains the same, but I notice more and more that his memory is fading. I do not fully understand the pattern; sometimes he surprises me by remembering things that I forget, but more commonly he has serious lapses. For example, he seems to have no recollection of having been in the hospital last weekend.
He doesn’t finish sentences; his bizarre statements / questions / responses have dissipated pretty much, but not completely.
He needs reminding (and a great deal of coaxing) to care for himself, but still manages independently yet exceptionally slowly (eating, shaving, dressing, and so on).
The situation is far from static; we need to keep a close eye on behaviour changes, but I am beginning to understand how very little control there is over the situation. The tumour plays havoc with his cognitive functioning in complex ways; the medication seems not to be the cause, although still, anything is possible. One day at a time is how we have to approach decision making, and so life is perpetually up in the air for us all.
One thing is for certain; love, affection, respect and devotion is the only ‘concoction’ that never creates negative side effects, so we’re just going to give him a huge dose, as many times a day as we can. Even though our health plan does not cover this, 'love potion' is the best medicine.
posted by Gilly at 9:05 AM
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